Stress Case

Okay so I have a confession to make....I am a HORRIBLE house keeper.  I hate cleaning with a passion, unless I am once again hopped up on the 'roids, but that is another post entirely.

So since I hate cleaning I put it off until last minute.  Which means I feel guilty about having people over, because what will they think of me?? Will they say I am lazy and awful?  Will they feel sorry for poor Brian who has to live in a pigsty? So before anyone comes over, I clean like a MAD WOMAN.  I mean I am on the ground cleaning  the corner behind the trash can, so maybe whoever comes over will not think that I have ignored that little corner for 5 months, which I probably have.  You know, because whenever someone comes over, the first thing they do is look for the spots I missed cleaning, right?

Yeah, I have finally realized that, well, no one actually cares to check if there are cobwebs under my stairs, or dust in the corner of my kitchen floor, or if things in my pantry are neat and orderly.  Because I have NEVER gone to someone elses house and looked at those things.  I never stare at their baseboards, or corners.  I don't check to see if there is dust behind the TV, so why do I freak out about that when someone is coming to my house? I mean honestly if I go to some one Else's home and it's not completely clean I feel better.  Like I have met a kindred soul who doesn't spend their life making a clean house all the time. And then I feel better about my house. 

I go through these stages where I clean the whole thing, top to bottom, for an entire day.  And I feel great about it.  But the next morning it's a mess again.  Unless I follow everyone around the house and pick up after them constantly. Which is miserable.  Which makes me crabby.  And really my kids and hubby would probably prefer dishes in the sink and shoes on the floor over a crabby mom.

So today, trying to ever stretch myself past my comfort zone, I said yes.  I said yes to an impromptu play date with Serena's friend after school even though my house will still a disaster from the day before.  Because really what 8 year old cares if I have dishes in my sink, or toys in my living room? Exactly.  No 8 year old would care, so why should I?  And her friend came over, and they did homework and played and it was great. 

As I see it I have 3 choices:

1. Spent all the time cleaning so that this self consciousness is a non-issue.
2.  Go back to work and hire a maid.
3. Get over it and live.

Though door number one is tempting on paper, I know it doesn't work for me.  And door number two is ridiculous.  So door number three it is.  I will clean the best I can and I will welcome life, kept or unkempt house.