Jesus said it best.

My angel Serena was a tiny thing as a toddler. Really tiny, like 10th% for height and weight at around 21 months. Itty bitty. Her Dr. warned me that if she were to get sick that any weight lost would put her in the hospital, she had no pounds that she could afford to lose. We had her on Pedia Sure, we had her on a higher fat diet (well higher than what I wanted her to eat), she got her flu shots, all was well.

Then there started to be reports ALL over the news about how awful this particular flu season was, and kids all over the US were dying. I remember watching it horrified, and crying. Well, bawling, worried that my precious one would catch the flu and die, after all the Dr. made sure to warn me.

Well, my wise husband told me to stop watching the news, Serena wasn't going to die. So I stopped, and the fear subsided as the flu "epidemic" went away.

Here we are again, I have an itty bitty 2 year old, and now the Swine Flu is swirling around killing people. So I have decided to heed the wise words of my hubby from 5 years ago, and I am not watching the news, at all.

If my daughters are going to catch it, than they are going to catch it. Watching every news story about it will simply cause me to worry and cry over something, I honestly have little control over.

I will be diligent to wash hands, and keep them away from sick people. I will try to keep them as fit as fiddles. I will pray to my God. That's all I can do.

So here's my response to the panic,

"Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life ?"
Matthew 6:27

Forget her, I'm not even ready!

Serena has her very first sleep over this weekend with her Brownie troop. We are to drop her off Friday at 7pm and pick her up Sunday at 9:30am. It's not a long time, but holy moly am I anxious.

She is not big on sleepovers away from us. Even when she BEGS to spend the night at Grandma and Pappa's she will call, to say she misses us. The last time she was supposed to sleep somewhere she cried her eyes out the night before worrying about it. She, being a first born, can be SUCH a worrier! So as this weekend got closer I was suprised that she had not shown any anxiety over it, I mean none.

Well, as we talked about it tonight, I reassured her, that if she missed us, she could call us and come home, that it was OK to come home. She smiled and said "Or I can just call you." I agreed, she could do that too, then she recited our phone number (she is very proud of having it memorized).

Then, at about 8 tonight, she was crying in her bed, and I knew why. I wanted to cry for the same reason. "I'm (sniff) going (sniff) to miss (sniff) you guys (sniff)! Followed by tears-a-plenty. I was kind of relieved, I don't think I am ready for her to be away 2 nights either. I reassured her that I could drop her off Saturday morning and pick her up Saturday night, that it would be OK. She calmed down and decided she wanted to stay Friday night, not Saturday night. Well boo. That's not what I wanted to hear.

Sounds selfish doesn't it? It feels selfish. I don't want to share her. Next time, I can go as a chaperon, but this time I just couldn't, and part of me was hoping she'd decide to stay home. I need my chick-a-dee's under my wings, not under the stars.

Well, we ended the conversation with me telling her, " No more tears. You can decide to stay home or sleep over, either way it is your decision and there is no reason to cry anymore. You can decide, and whatever you pick is fine." She calmed down and went back to bed, and I am secretly hoping she changes her mind tomorrow morning. If not, I will just have to relax. Hard as that may be.

Sigh.

Wisdom from my weekend

One of the speakers, in a workshop entitled " Growing compassionate children in an affluent culture." said something that has been bouncing off and around the inside of my skull all morning.

She was discussing a curriculum that teaches kids about the plights of other children in different cultures, and she said

"If we shelter our children from every injustice in the world, how will they ever be moved to act on them?

Amen to that.

Though we need to be age appropriate in what we discuss, and know what our children can handle, NOT informing them what the world is really like, and NOT giving them the sense that God doesn't like it either and He wants to use us to change it, will leave our kids far to self-centered. Not teaching our kids to serve others will leave them emotionally handicapped and bankrupt as they reach the real world and bitterly realize the world isn't out to make them happy. They need to learn at an early age the joy and fulfillment that comes in serving others through the love of Jesus.

Now I need to put my money where my blog is and start planning on how to educate my daughters in the joy of service for Jesus.

My Garden

Here's my spring flower mix...I wish I knew what all of them were called.

Here is my Sweet Basil, and part of the Spring Flowers

Here is the lovely bench my dad built and painted. On the ground is a potato plant, which grew from being in water with tooth picks. Also Serena's Lima Bean plant. None of us eat Lima Beans, but she brought it home from school, so we had to plant it. In the middle of the stand is an Aster plant which sprouted but stopped growing in full sun, so I am hoping a break from it may help it grow some more...we'll see.

Here are my tomato plant, the beginning of bachelor buttons, Rosemary, German Thyme and a sunflower seed JUST starting to peek out in the back.

Here are the fabulous details my mom painted on. If only I was blessed with her gifts!

More of her art work, it goes over every leg.

My weekend

I had such an amazing weekend! I was able to attend a conference focused (mostly) on training and equipping Sunday school teachers. I learned SO many things! I was able to attend 6 1/2 workshops as well as talk with other teachers I met there, and brainstorm with some teachers from my own church.

I received such a plethora of information that I seriously need to take time tomorrow to go through, and sort it out, because at the moment it is all swirling around in my brain. Luckily I took a lot of notes, so it should be a very fulfilling day tomorrow as I spend time with my Jesus planning how to use what I learned.

One of my favorite things I learned was about ending discipline on a positive note. The basics were 3 questions followed by a statement:

1. What did you do wrong? (Making sure that they confess with their mouth)
2. Why was it wrong? ( a chance to talk about the values behind the rules)
3. OK, so what can you differently next time? (Help them to make a plan to make the right choice next time)
4. OK, let's go do it!

In my future blogs I will go into more detail about it all, but my brain is way too sleepy for it yet! Good night!

In Awe, once again

My girls...same parents...same sex....worlds apart. I was reminded

of this fact once, well twice, again today. Being that it was hot, I

knew I needed some diversion for them, so I let them play out

back with buckets of water and the hose. Need I say it was hilarious? Well, it was hilarious. Chloe who is a water bug was stepping in the buckets and splashing the water on herself to cool down, and Serena was bossing her around. Well, instructing her would be a better way of saying it, she was doing it kindly after all. They were both in their elements: Serena was the leader and Chloe was the free spirit.

Then, my Chloe's personality showed through once again. She hates diapers and strips them off whenever possible. I have been trying to potty train her but she'd never stay on the potty long enough to do it. SO let's just say, thank God for my carpet cleaner. I have been trying a trick I read in Parenting with Love and Logic. Where instead of hounding her, I simply have been telling her how when you go pee pee in the potty, your legs don't get wet, and I like going pee pee in the potty so I stay clean. I know she's been listening, because she'll repeat it back to me "stay clean?". Well tonight, me and my girls were watching Mary Poppins when Brian called me (he went to hang-out with an old high school buddy), so I went into the bathroom to be able to hear him over the movie and the kids. Chloe came to join me (surprise surprise right? Getting on the phone ALWAYS gets their attention). She sat on her potty, naked, because that's how she rolls. I didn't pay attention, I was talking. Well, I hang up with Brian, she stands up and the potty is full of pee!

I was screaming with glee! I made Serena come in and look (can you imagine how "thrilled" she was?) and I called Brian back to tell him the good news. Then we called my dad and she told him. I must have hugged her and given her five a 1000 times. It was awesome.

This led me to think of when Serena was this age and potty training. I would have to ask her, every 20 minutes to go. She would not use the potty chair. We had to put the special seat on the toilet and have a step stool in front for her to climb up on. She didn't start going on her own without me asking for a while.

My girls have such different strengths, and I love that God has blessed me with being able to experience such opposite personalities. Serena is book smart, she learns fast, she talks all the time, she understands and picks up emotion in people very well. She pays attention to people. She is a compliant child, and thus loves to make people happy. I am thankful God broke me in with an easy child.

Then popped out Chloe, different from birth. If she could have come out running, she would have. She is mechanical in nature, she learns new physical skills much quicker, and with more ease than Serena does. She does not talk nearly as much, nor does she pay attention to emotions in people as much as her sister did at this age. Serena was prone to less fits of rage because she would talk about it more. She loves face time with people. Chloe is fine being on her own to play or with friends. She does not get easily overwhelmed when situations vary from her norm. When she gets mad, she has a fit, a big one. She is strong willed to the bone.

I love them both, and I love thier personalities equally for different reasons. I love that they will be forced to deal with thier polar opposite as they grow. I know this will grow and strengthen both of thier characters, and they will learn valuable people skills because of it.

Slumdog Millionaire

Brian rented Slumdog Millionaire last night, and I really enjoyed it. Thinking that people ACTUALLY live that way, broke my heart, though. To think of all those little kids, on thier own, the same age as my daughter...sigh.

But, the part I enjoyed what was a great story it was. It really told a story that drew you in. And, my brain went back to my favorite english class, and my favorite teacher, and how he would always try to make us think, and notice things the author purposefully put in/ or left out of a book. So here's my discussion question:

What do you think the trains symbolized? What was thier importance? There was a train in each key scene of the movie, so they have to mean something. I have my own ideas, but I am looking forward to hearing everyone elses ideas!!

Ok GO!

I eat them.

Serena spent the night at Grandma and Papas house on Saturday and she baked cupcakes. So, being the kind girl that she is she brought home 4 of them, 1 for each of us. She put them in the fridge to save for later. Sometime between then and when I was getting the girls ready for bed Chloe got into the fridge when no one was looking, and helped herself to all the frosting.

I found this rather funny, so I snapped a picture and showed Brian. He called Chloe over to him and showed her the picture, "What's this Chloe?" She replied "cupcakes". He then asked "What happened to the cupcakes?" "I eat them"

At least she's honest

Chloe is a little too attached to her Binky. So I put it up on top of our TV in the living room, you know, so she couldn't reach it. Then we left to take Serena to school. As soon as we got back, she climbed out of the stroller, grabbed a chair and walked over to the TV. I asked what she was doing, and she said "Getting Binky", like it was nothing. Well, lo and behold, she CAN reach the top of the TV standing on her tip toes on top of a chair.

And as I was typing this , I looked over to see the dreaded Binky in her mouth, again. So I took it out and told her "Binkiess are for bedtime." to which Chloe said "I need help. Come on mommy." So she took me by the hand to take me downstairs, and I asked her, "What do you need me to do?" "Get chair." Nice try little one...I already learned my lesson on that one.

Side note: As we were downstairs I went outside to water my plants, and my little gardener helped me, and watered herself while she was at. As we came in she said "Wet." So I took off her dress. She looked at me and said "waters wet". Keen observation kiddo. ;o)

Everyday Blessings

My dear husband is taking a well deserved r&r trip to spend time with God at Forest Home this weekend, so it's just me and my girls. Sometimes this is a fun time of bonding, others it's stressful and agitating. This day started as the stressful and agitating kind. Chloe kept me up last night, then she was whiny and clingy all day.

I went to my parents house for dinner, looking forward to time with family AND a distraction for Chloe. When I got there I saw new plants on the new planting work bench my dad made for my mom, and I admired how pretty they were. Then my dad said they were all for me. It was such a sweet gesture. It wasn't anything extravagant, but it was still overwhelming. This place is the first I have been able to have plants outside in my own backyard, and I have a total of 5 right now sitting back there. Now I have 5 more to add to it. Tomatoes, sweet basil, German thyme, rosemary and a mix of spring flowers. My parents love me...what more could I ask for, right?

Well my Heavenly Father loves me too, and He made sure I knew that today too. Serena started to have an asthma attack at my parents house, while we were there for dinner, and since she is unable to use an inhaler, I raced home to get the nebulizer and meds to bring back to her. And, as I speed off, I hit major traffic going to my house, so I prayed "God keep my baby safe until I get back." I rushed, rushed, rushed, got back as fast I could to find Serena eating dinner, not a cough or a wheeze. My parents said that she stopped coughing as soon as I left.

God is faithful. My parents are awesome. Chloe is asleep hopefully for a restful night. It's amazing how I find blessings everywhere, when I stop to look.

"Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." Psalm 46:10

Greek or Geek

I really wish I was well versed in Greek. I love when Pastor Brent tells us what the original Greek word was in the Bible and it's full meaning. I geek out about it. I try to spell it (HA!) in my notes and fiendishly scribble the meaning.

Well Beth Moore is right up my alley, because apparently she's a Greek geek too. I really love getting a more in-depth picture of scripture with Greek words. Such as, my new favorite:
Makrothumia. It was in my study book this week on Patience (it's a study of the fruit of the spirit). She uses two words, both needed to explain patience, hupomone and makrothumia, the later being my favorite though.

In her words "Hupomone possesses the meaning you most often associate with the word patience. It means, "to persevere, remain under...bearing up under...refers to that quality of character which does not allow one to surrender to circumstances or succumb under trial." Hupomone is endurance with relation to "things or circumstances". It is often translated "endurance" or "perseverance". A very strong association with hope is crucial to our understanding of the word hupomone."

Again in her words, " Makrothumia means "to be long-suffering" It means "forbearance..self-restraint before proceeding to action." It is (my favorite part) "the quality of a person who is able to avenge himself yet refrains from doing so. Makrothumia is patience in respect to persons. Everywhere you discover the word makrothumia, you find some form of mercy. The Greek word for the kind of "mercy" present in makrothumia is eleos. The word means "mercy, compassion, active pity, with the sense of goodness in general, especially piety." Scripture uses eleos to describe God."

Makrothumia means so much to me because of the phrase "being able to avenge himself yet refrains from doing so." That's power. Being able to, yet holding back anyway. I am thankful for God possessing Makrothumia. He has put up with A LOT from me and held back his wrath. That has been swirling around in my head all week after reading that.

But also, it is something I truly want to embody myself. I can have a pretty sharp tongue, something I used to be proud of. I have a large vocabulary and I know how to use it when I want to. BUT to be able to avenge myself, yet refraining....wow. Maybe I am alone in this, but that is a huge obstacle for me. I like to prove myself right. I love to argue and banter, it energizes me, and yes there is a time and a place for it...but when the place isn't right, and the time hasn't come...then what? Usually I'd say it anyway, and feel good about it too. God has been working on shutting my mouth and opening up my ears and heart. Makrothumia sounds good to me, it sounds exciting. Knowing what I can do, but using restraint, holding MYSELF back. Lord knows I'll stumble and harsh words will burst from my mouth like Niagara falls at awful times, but this is my new quest, to be so filled with his Spirit, that I can refrain.

Just tickled!

Chloe is talking, so much more, every single day. It's amazing how quickly she picks up words and phrases. Her newest one cracks me up.

"I need_______" The blank is filled in by various words, such as binky, bear (her favorite stuffed animal), taggie (her blanket), juice, pillow, play with Lexi, ect.

I started wondering where she got it from. My smart little cookie listens to me more than I thought, apparently. I always say "You don't need your binky, that's for ni night." Or, "You don't need juice, drink your milk," ect. Well, she figured out that she should tell me that she DOES need these things. I am just tickled that she figured out how to try to get around what I say. Maybe I should be worried about how this kind of thought process will show itself later on in her life, but for now I am just excited to see how smart she is.

Come Thou Fount

I love this song, absolutely love it. It came on this morning as I was driving home from Mom's and I felt like I just had to post it. The part that always gets me is the lyric "Prone to wonder, Lord I feel it. Prone to leave the God I love. Take my heart, O take and seal it. Seal it for Thy courts above."


There are a few words in this song, that we don't really use on a daily basis, so I looked them up. Here they are:

fetter: A chain or shackle for the ankles or feet. Something that serves to restrict; a restraint.

ebenezer: (stone of help ), a stone set up by Samuel after a signal defeat of the Philistines, as a memorial of the "help" received on the occasion from Jehovah. (1 Samuel 7:12) Its position is carefully defined as between Mizpeh and Shen.

Come, Thou Fount of every blessing,
Tune my heart to sing Thy grace;
Streams of mercy, never ceasing,
Call for songs of loudest praise.
Teach me some melodious sonnet,
Sung by flaming tongues above.
Praise the mount! I’m fixed upon it,
Mount of Thy redeeming love.
Sorrowing I shall be in spirit,
Till released from flesh and sin,
Yet from what I do inherit,
Here Thy praises I’ll begin;
Here I raise my Ebenezer;
Here by Thy great help I’ve come;
And I hope, by Thy good pleasure,
Safely to arrive at home.

Jesus sought me when a stranger,
Wandering from the fold of God;
He, to rescue me from danger,
Interposed His precious blood;
How His kindness yet pursues me
Mortal tongue can never tell,
Clothed in flesh, till death shall loose me
I cannot proclaim it well.
O to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter,
Bind my wandering heart to Thee.
Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
Prone to leave the God I love;
Here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
Seal it for Thy courts above.
O that day when freed from sinning,
I shall see Thy lovely face;
Clothed then in blood washed linen
How I’ll sing Thy sovereign grace;
Come, my Lord, no longer tarry,
Take my ransomed soul away;
Send thine angels now to carry
Me to realms of endless day.

SIGH...one big contented SIGH. Thank you Jesus

Moms a plenty

I started doing this Bible study called " Living Beyond Yourself" By Beth Moore a few months back. I had done part of a study of hers before, and loved it. Well, loved/hated it to be honest. Loved it because God spoke to me. Hated it because God spoke to me. Both times He has used these studies to stretch me, far beyond what I wanted (maybe the title of this one should have given it away, but I am rather dense.)

Well, let's be honest, I did complete MOST of the homework, but not all of it. So, now in the time I devote to studying God's word (i.e. Chloe's nap time) I have been going back to complete it. I wish I could say it was solely because of my pious ways, but honestly, I am neurotic. Let's call a spade a spade. BUT, in the way He always does God has been speaking volumes through the bits and pieces of studies I "needed" to finish. He used me to minister to my mommy about Agape. AWESOME. He then reminded me of my many blessings in my church family in the study on Joy.
I am so excited to have Mom's tomorrow. I get to spend time in fellowship with amazing women who make me want to be better. What an amazing gift! Women who love me for where I am, yet help move me forward. It's a happy day. NOT because of anything new, but because of a reminder of something old. Shore Life has been a big chunk of my life. I started there at age 14, I am almost 28, so literally half my life has been there. Yet, it never seems old, I meet new people, get to be loved by old friends and develop new friendships all the time. My first day of Mom's I was expecting all the women to talk about how they have it all together and look down on me for what I am lacking. However, what I encountered was a group of women commiserating together over struggles, laughing over the idiosyncrasies of toddler hood and motherhood, and a sharing of ideas that energizes me to do my job better.

So forgive me if this post is abruptly ended, but I need my sleep for my great day tomorrow. Good night all!

So many shoes...so few she likes.

My Serena, oh my Serena. She is so, well, Serena.


We went shopping for new shoes with her birthday money yesterday. She has her favorite shoes, and that's all she'll wear, so they wear out quickly. Usually more quickly than she can outgrow them. Her favorite schools shoes were no exception. So we took a trip to Payless. Now, on a previous shopping trip she had sworn up and down that these shoes we bought fit her, until we got home, and I cut off the tags, and she wore them to school. Then the truth came out. They were too big, and somehow I didn't notice in the store. My bad, I know. But she loved them so much she was rather convincing on how great they felt on her feet. So now those gorgeous shoes are sitting pretty, in her closet, waiting for her feet to grow, but I digress.

So on the way to Payless, I told her that if a shoe doesn't fit, to tell me. Cause if she makes us buy shoes that don't fit her, well, she's wearing them anyway. I learned my lesson. I already know what it's going to be like, too. She'll hate everything I think is adorable. This is how we work. I like it, she hates it, but hey at least she's consistent. I was prepared for a long time of trying on shoes. I was prepared not to say that I liked anything before she did. My only rules were, 1 pair of shoes appropriate for school, and 1 for weekends/summer. I don't do wedge sneakers, no matter how in style they are. My little girl should be able to run at school without spraining her ankle on heels. Other than that, her choice.

Poor daddy. I don't think he's taken her shoe shopping yet. He loved these little sporty sneakers, and wanted her to get them. I gave him the "You have no chance, give up now" look, but he kept trying. I guess no one gave him the "Serena is the opposite of sporty" memo. He made her try them on, and I wish I had my camera to capture her face. I had to turn around and laugh so she wouldn't see me. It was the most defiant "these are gross" face ever, and utterly hilarious. Well, guess who won? Yup, she did. The shoes on the side are the ones she picked, only in black. And she got a pair of Hannah Montana black flip flops with silver chains on the straps. Very cute. Very Serena.


The shopping experience was very Serena. She only likes what she likes, and she will settle for nothing less. Though I struggle with that characteristic of hers, I remind myself that it will serve her in life to never settle. Not that she should be elitist, but not to settle below her standards, that will help as she grows, and spreads her wings away from me.


Thank you Jesus for my Serena.


Oh, and my Chloe, what was she doing this whole time? She decided to get into boxes and try on her shoes she liked too! She tried on the pink ones...and walked up and down the aisle imitating sissy.

Just getting started

I love to read blogs. I love reading the thoughts of other people.

I'm hoping that some of you feel the same about me.

So here I am, with my very first blog. I was hoping to start with a wonderful quip filled entry, but my girls have other ideas. So I will return later, hopefully with wit, and sleeping children!